“My husband would rather look at porn than be intimate with me.”
“I’ve lost my husband to the fantasy images on his computer.”
“My husband has tried to stop looking at porn but it’s become an addiction he is now rationalizing.”
I frequently hear these types of statements from wives seeking counsel because they have lost their husband to a spirit of addiction to pornography.
They feel abandoned, rejected, and alone. Their husbands are no longer interested in being intimate with them. Husbands, however, tend to think quite differently about the use of pornography. They rationalize it as a “safe sin” that hurts no one.
One husband said, “Whats the big deal? I am not hurting anyone, and it’s better than cheating. She is too tired from dealing with the children all day anyway so my pornography use actually gives her a break.”
The porn industry in the United States alone generates approximately $13 billion each year with 3 billion made from internet porn.
A startling statistic indicates that worldwide porn use is down 50% since 2007 because so much of it is now free.
Statistics of Pornography in the Church
64% of Christian men and 15% of Christian women view porn at least once a month.
A 1996 Promise Keepers survey at one of their stadium events revealed that over 50% of the men in attendance were involved with pornography within one week of attending the event. ( From the website http://coventanteyes.com)
51% of pastors say cyber-porn is a possible temptation. 37% say it is a current struggle (Christianity Today, Leadership Survey, 12/2001).
How Pornography Addicts the Mind
God designed oxytocin as the glue for human bonding. During a sexual release, oxytocin, along with other neurochemicals are released and cause us to emotionally bond with our partner. When you watch porn, these neurochemicals are also released, which bind you to those images. This is why Satan attacks our sexuality so much, because in attacking human sexuality it actually interferes with human bonding.
According to a neuropsychologist, Dr. Tim Jennings, “Any type of repetitive behavior will create trails in our brain that are going to fire in an automatic sequence.” The result is years of bondage. This is how 68 percent of Christian men can love the Lord with all their heart, but be trapped in sexual bondage. The repeated viewing of porn literally changes the physical structure of their brain.” (Charisma Magazine “How to Conquer Porn Epidemic in the Church”, 6/30/2014)
5-Steps That Interrupt the Bondage of Pornography Addiction Jailing Your Spouse
- Bind the spirits of perversion tormenting your husband by praying, “ I bind up the strongman of perversion and bondage operating in my husband’s life. I bind every spirit of pornography, addiction, lust, seduction, and fantasy that has entered through his eyes with the blood of Jesus Christ. I loose over his mind, clarity, wisdom and knowledge. I declare that my husband has the mind of Christ, and the wisdom of God is formed within him.”
- Break the ungodly soul ties with the people that introduced your husband to pornography, along with every person that you are aware of who filmed, produced, or starred in the pornography he has viewed. Declare out loud, “I break every ungodly soul tie between my husband and (name) and (name) and my husband with the blood of Jesus Christ.”
- Pray our House Cleaning Prayer over your home and the computer area where porn is viewed.
- Break any word curses either you or your husband has spoken about his use of pornography by declaring: ‘ I break every word curse I have spoken over my husband that he is addicted to pornography, and I cancel the assignment of that word curse, in Jesus’ name. I declare instead my husband is free from the bondage of pornography in Jesus’ name.
- Seek deliverance counseling. Hopefully, both of you can go, but if not go alone. Pornography is an actual sin that you can see and point blame at, but the sin of bitterness is equal in toxicity as it sneaks in to overtake the wife of a porn user. Don’t be caught in the bitter, resentful, cycle of blame and negativity, get help!
Sadly, we see many clients whose marriages are suffering from the effects of pornography but we also see the victories of God when one spouse comes in willing to break the cycle of bondage!