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You are here: Home / Christian Counseling / Have You Grieved Too Long or Not Long Enough?

Have You Grieved Too Long or Not Long Enough?

By Phyllis Tarbox

grieved too long

Loss is a part of everyone’s life; no one is immune. How long one grieves that loss however, will determine whether they move forward to a season of restoration or get ensnared in a stronghold of depression.

God is not the author of the loss rather He is the one who turns the mourning to joy and brings in a garment of praise for that spirit of heaviness. His plan is to take what was meant for evil and use it as a catalyst that will propel you in a new direction, like a closed road that detours you to find another route to your destination.

There are stages of grieving this loss, however, that one must allow oneself to work through. Experts tell us that these stages include emotions such as shock, denial, bargaining, depression, anger, guilt, confusion and finally hope and acceptance. Everyone handles the pain of loss differently.

One of the most common mistakes believers make is to try and hurry the process. We feel guilty if we don’t just, “snap out of it!” If we don’t allow ourselves to grieve properly, and instead suppress our emotions, the grief will intensify and give the demonic kingdom an open door to build a stronghold. Glossed over losses can open doors to demonic spirits of sorrow, self-pity, and fear in a person’s soul. It’s the enemy’s card “in the hole” he trumps you with, just when you are about to win the game.

There is a time for grieving and a time for crossing over. In Deut. 34:8, we learn that the people of Israel grieved the death of Moses for thirty days. If Joshua had not been able to mourn appropriately and then mobilize they would have all missed the strategic time to cross over into their inheritance. Thirty days is not a long time, but Joshua knew the grace to grieve had lifted and it was time to move.

Ecclesiastes 3:4 tells us, ‘there is a time to weep and time to laugh and a time to mourn and a time to dance. You will feel the pain of loss as you move on with God, but feeling the pain and being consumed by depression is not the same thing.

If something has you stuck under that blanket of heaviness, God has a plan for your deliverance. He never meant for his children to cower under the hands of the accuser. His promises are not to harm you but to give you hope for a future, and many times that requires releasing the burdens of the past at the right time.

The only way to know Gods timing and his plan for you is to spend time with him. Return to your first love and listen, seek Godly counsel, and do not isolate.

Filed Under: Christian Counseling Tagged With: depression

 

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